Ever wonder what happened to those Celebrities that you used to watch in your favorite Sitcoms growing up?
Lets take a Look at a few.....
Bill Fagerbakke
Who he was:
Fagerbakke was best known for his role as the football player turned assistant coach "Dauber Dubynski" on the sitcom Coach. Oh, and for having a name that sounds like the Klingon slang for "circle jerk."
Fagerbakke' character on the show was a dimwitted buffoon who, along with Jerry Van Dyke, sent Craig T. Nelson' character into explosions of arm-waving exasperation. That' about as deep as it went for Dauber, all 189 episodes of him.
He also turned up as the mentally handicapped guy in Stephen King' The Stand, another link in a very depressing chain of typecasting.
What you'd think he' doing:
Maybe still reading for roles that have "dim-witted" or "mentally challenged" in the description. Or, if you're the ironic sort, maybe you think he turned out to be a real-life supergenius who now owns a software company and occasionally appears on MSNBC with glasses and a sophisticated beard.
What he's actually doing:
Yup, Patrick Star.
The Patrick Star. If you've seen both
Coach and
SpongeBob SquarePants then you know the two characters are actually very similar, but we're thinking it' rare that an adult watches both of those shows in the same day.
Darius McCrary
Who he was:
McCrary is best known as "Eddie Winslow" on Family Matters, more commonly referred to as "That Urkel Show."
Eddie was the eldest of the Winslow children and also carried the majority of subplots that dealt with playing sports, getting girls, helping Urkel, or some combination of the three. He also got beat up by a street gang on a very special episode.
What you'd think he' doing:
Jail. Or, best-case scenario, maybe turning up in a straight-to-video Steven Seagal movie, most likely as the lead henchman with a goofy nickname like "Grimace."
What he's actually doing:Talking shit to Megatron, believe it or not.
McCrary voiced the heroic Autobot "Jazz" in the
Transformers movie. Per the script and Michael Bay' subtle direction, McCrary gave Jazz a deeper characterization than what the '80s cartoon could: the token black guy.
Still, it' work.
There were some ugly Internet rumors about McCrary, namely that he was spreading HIV to many, many partners. There appears to be no proof at all of this (according to Snopes, anyway.) And, in his own defense McCrary has said, "Only thing I am guilty of is loving ladies! And maybe loving them too good."
Sara Gilbert
Who she was:
Gilbert is remembered as playing the Emmy-nominated supporting role of "Darlene Conner" on Roseanne. Darlene was a sarcastic tomboy who always dressed in black, and thus was love at first sight for many a teenage boy.
What you'd think she' doing:
We'd guess something other than acting. Like how George Foreman stopped being a boxer and became a grill salesman, or how Al Pacino stopped acting and started making good money doing Al Pacino impersonations.
She had a "too-smart-for-acting" vibe, so we'll take a stab that she writes books or columns for various magazines.
What she's actually doing:
Other women, thus shattering the hearts of many a young male who spent hours on his Sara Gilbert fan site on Geocities back in the day. Gilbert has two children with Allison Adler, the first of which her partner carried while Gilbert gestated the second.
She also supports a healthy dose of organizations like Meals on Wheels, Freedom of Speech and AIDS Project Los Angeles.
Jodie Sweetin
Who she was:
Sweetin played middle child "Stephanie Tanner" on the inexplicably popular Full House.
She enjoyed the show' spotlight starting when the Olsen twins were just drooling props and ending when her phrase "How rude!" started making her sound like a tweeny bitch.
What you'd think she' doing:
We would take a guess at Lifetime movies, but Moll has that market cornered. Porn is too obvious ... so is a singing career. It' a classic, but we'll go with life-ruining addiction on this one.
What she's actually doing:
Drugs. Or she was, anyway.
Combine her parents' history of addiction and a lack of work after Full House, and you get a shitstorm of drugs and booze that began in high school and culminated with meth a few years ago.
But more importantly, what' with that screen caption up there? Either it' written in Engrish or it' somebody called "Fallen Star" who is composed of a Full House actress and meth.
Thankfully things did turn up. Five rotted teeth and a lengthy stay in rehab later, she now gives public speeches about her addictions. AND, she' happily remarried and expecting her first child in 2008.(Updated: Jodie is now divorced, Back on drugs and is struggling to get custody of her daughter)
She' also gotten back into TV, hosting
Pants-Off Dance-Off (hey, it's work) and is working on a television pilot called
Small Bits of Happiness about a suicidal child actress.
Danica McKellar
Who she was:
McKellar is familiar to most as Winnie Cooper, the girl next door and main love interest of Fred Savage' Kevin Arnold in The Wonder Years. The on-and-off romance lasted the entire series, like a far less annoying "Ross and Rachel" for kids.
She also became a source of many crushes for developing boys across America, and probably some pedophiles.
What you'd think she' doing:
Since The Wonder Years took place in the late '60s to early '70s, the clothes had to fit the era. So, maybe she cashed in on that and sold a line of vintage clothing. Or, porn.
What she's actually doing:
She' a math genius. She helped develop what's come be known as the "Chayes-Mckellar-Winn-Theorem" while she was a mathematics major at UCLA. And, she has an Erdos—Bacon number of 6. A team of five were sent to investigate what the fuck either of those things are. Results are still pending.
She also wrote a book to help schoolgirls improve their math and even occasionally answers readers' math questions on her website.
